From Sophia's Blog verewig
What Women Want
How does he make her feel so sexy?
RSS Add-Me
If I wanted nice in my life I'd screw Mr. Rogers (2,144 reads)
Bad boys make good girls come
by Lindsey Wasley
What’s the worse word you can use to describe someone? It’s ok to say that your girlfriend is hot although beautiful is better — much better. It’s fine to describe your man as smart or even strong, but if you have to resort to the word “nice,” then you’re in trouble. We’ve all been in that situation when a date just didn’t work out like we expected it to. We come home and our friends ask us, “What was it like?” and all you can muster up is “nice.”
‘Nice,’ is the kiss of death for men. This is because women don’t want nice they want passion, excitement and a bad boy. This isn’t the 6-foot-five, leather bound, facial tattooed guy of my ArtsEtc. counterparts, the Last Action Heroes. This is also certainly not the good guy that writes inside the margins of his notebook and addresses a woman as “miss.”
“Nice guys finish last” for a reason. If you’re currently a ‘nice guy’ and want be a bad boy, good luck cause you’ll need it. Sorry to say, but you already have a nice guy reputation. So how do you break the curse? I’ve been asked to give some encouragement to the ‘nice’ guys who are falling through the cracks.
While complex, there are certain personality traits that women are more attracted too. These include being unpredictable and uncontrollable. The challenge is then how to shake yourself of the nice guy and become badass. You can start with stop labeling yourself as a nice guy. While you’re at it, unbutton your collar and loosen up.
If I wanted nice in my life I’d screw Mr. Rogers or maybe wear flowers in my hair. Nice men are safe and reliable, but most of all, they are boring. I think I would go insane if I spent the rest of my life with a guy that actually listened to my ramblings about shoes and gossip. Or, god forbid, turned off ESPN Game Day and wanted to talk about our relationship. That’s my job and I won’t have a nice guy coming in and taking that away from me.
It’s kind of strange how women say that they like the nice guys but then never actually date them. Chelsea, a University of Wisconsin junior, put it like this well, “I want a nice guy. For me, things in my life are tough enough; I’d rather just have a pretty easy relationship. But when I find a guy that’s TOO nice I want to dump him. I guess maybe when I say I want a “nice” guy I mean the opposite of sleazy, but not boring.” The initial attraction to the nice guy is there. Most women like being catered to, but this attraction will fade into dull amusement, eventually sizzling out without a little fire to keep it going.
The best situation is dating a former bad boy. If that bad boy you’re dating turns good — not nice but good — then it’s ok cause we know that he was once bad. He will still be emotionally unavailable, leaving the woman to spend her free time freaking out about why he’s like this. This is our job to be emotional basket cases; again, I wouldn’t want some nice guy taking this away from me.
Not only do women interpret a nice guy as boring but they also equate nice as being bad in bed. I’ve heard the argument that the nice boys will tend to a woman’s needs better than a bad boy. I disagree because Rambo isn’t going to settle for 10 minutes of missionary. The bad boy will take charge and screw like he means it. It’s sad to say, but once you’ve had one nice guy, you’ve had them all.
Being badass is all relative. Some chicks might think being badass is skipping your last class Friday for FAC while the next girl might want a newly released inmate. Bad boys are always going to be intriguing and slightly unavailable. There is no challenge with a man at your beck and call. Think Brad Pitt’s character in “Fight Club” taking a woman out for nice dinner. A picture of the perfect bad boy should be becoming clear.
Being a bad boy does not mean treating your girl like shit or cheating on her. Rather, a woman wants a man that is a little badass in life and has some balls. As much as we don’t want you in a fight, you better stand up for yourself in a sticky situation. Although women don’t want every girly desire to be indulged, they still expect kindness and the occasional back-rub.
So the “nice guys finish last” theory is true. I am not advocating that all men on campus become a massive group of jerks. You can be a bad boy without standing your girlfriend up or causing her to cry. Don’t confuse being badass with sleaze, just leave a little something for our overactive emotions to analyze.
Do ANY women prefer a kind and considerate man?
Are there any women ordinary men attractive?
Is Lindsey rightin her post?
If women had to choose would they prefer to be treated like shit or being
treated with respect by a guy?
Ok well since they want bad boys they should just say that in the first
place, stick to those guys and stop trying to marry the "nice" ones. Most
of them don't deserve to be provided for by the responsible guy anyway.
Hang with the bad boy w/ bad credit then, lol.
Ali woman like this like to be whoped, I was told this by many woman and I
witnessed it first thand.......It's true don't know how to go about it, I
am confused about woman in so many ways.
Oh yeah and BTW, women like the one who wrote this article aren't good
girls at all. They're bad girls POSING as good girls! Wolves in sheep's
clothing. So we shouldn't let our strings be pulled and buttons be pushed
by what they say, they want us wrapped around their little finger,
remember?
Guys - again - it's notbeing a bad boy jerk, it's just having your own
life.
Woman don't want a guy they can walk all over. They don't want a guy who is
so preditable. No lap dogs. Tell her off if you have to.
Bob I'm beginning to think that we are not usually the problem, as we have
been led to believe, after all.
Ali - I suspect youre correct in your comments. This may explain the fact
that 75% of all relationships fail with women rerquesting the breakup in
the majority of instances.
She can kill with a smile, she can wound with her eyes
She can ruin your faith with her casual lies
And she only reveals what she wants you to see
She hides like a child, but she's always a woman to me
Guys, don't let them turn you. Maintain your integrity. They are not worth
you diminishing yourself by becomming a jerk, no matter how much they would
like to see you become "badder".
>>My last ex I think wanted me to become like her first husband. BTW,
he beat her so much he almost killed her on at least one occasion. I have
no idea why a woman would want to repeat such an experience with anybody
else but sometimes when she was with me she would push my buttons as if
wanting me to cut loose on her. She KNEW what she was doing.<< -
psychologists say that women who were molested as children by a family
member often behave this way. There behavior is pathological and they badly
need therapy.
Well apparantly she was sexually assaulted when she was a child...not by
family though. Still...
I'm treated great by my boyfriend and I find it immature to want otherwise.
My guy's a great lover and does indulge in some verbal fantasies that turn
me and him on that are of a "bad boy image". But I know it's all in fun
and he treats me with the greatest respect which is the best turn-on to me.
If I wanted nice in my life I’d screw Mr. Rogers
Is it me or is this site suddenly being over run with females who are bad
boy fans. I have no problem with it but damn.
" Most men depend on logic and most women depend on emotion."
"My advice to nice guys is stay away from highly emotional females. if none
of this makes sense let me know and I'll clear it up as best as I can for
ya'll."
"Actaually that makes perfect sense. Less drama that way"
One way to spot a highly emotional guy, he says things like "women don't
want us nice guys, they only want bad boys" or he claims he's going to
change from being "nice" to being a jerk in order to get women. Those
types of men are most likely bad news.
"Unless the guy is the highly emotional one."
Let some people here tell it, men never show any emotion or lapses in
logic. Just reading some of the posts here it's obvious that is not true.
I wonder why this thread isn't called "If I wanted nice in my life I'd
screw Denzel Washington"? He is considered a nice guy.
Well, except for the whole Training Day thing. Lol. All those other classic
roles under his belt, but THAT's what got him an oscar for best actor.
Acting like a corrupt asshole. That's hollywood for you.
That was women AND men voting. And it was probably over guilt for not
giving him the Oscar for Malcolm X.
It was probably Halle's best performance, but it was not the best
performance of the year.
Girls don't like nice guys because they often tend to be needy. Girls like
a challenge, and bad boys are challenging.
Ladies, let me tell you something. If I wanted nice in my life I'd screw
Mary Poppins. There seems to be this myth circulating around the sisterhood
that just because a guy is not an aggressive jerk/bad boy he must be boring
to be with. A guy who may appear to be Mr. Rogers on the surface has
desires at the very least to be equal to the sexiest badass with whom
you've ever shared a bed. The nerdish guy, the soft-spoken introvert may
very well be the sexy freak you've been looking for.
Some will laugh it off as saying he's going through a mid-life crisis. However a man might not have had the experiences of others while in his teens, twenties, or even older. That doesn't mean those desires go away. There's still something inside him that wants all of what he didn't have back in the day. A man like this may be the one who makes you forget all others, that is if a woman is perceptive enough to see that fact. Better keep your rolodex for swing partners handy ladies.
I still remain less than impressed with many women and their ability to choose a partner who's right for them. If their sense about men was so good how come there are so many bad relationships out there?
That's a good question John...you would think that if they were choosing on
the right criteria (like they claim they are), then those choices would pan
out more often. In fact the opposite is happening. If the divorce rate is
50-60% on the average then the divorce rate with the wrong kind of guy is
going to be higher than the average maybe closer to 80-90% so they're
shooting themselves in the foot. Yet according to them the nice guys are
the problem...well how are nice guys the problem when these women refuse to
date them? Seems to me like the nice guys are a non-issue for a lot of
these women because they aren't dealing with them on a romantic
level...until of course they have accumulated debt and kids and lots of
problems stemming from bad relationships with their favorite bad men. They
figure somebody's gotta help them thru their tough times. If the bad boys
were the right choice then those guys would stick around and do the right
thing by the women who they deal with. Since they don't, the proof is in
the pudding. But it's up to the women to realize this.
"until of course they have accumulated debt and kids "
